“What is your greatest accomplishment?” Those five words sat in bold above an empty page.
I was reapplying for scholarships and this was the essay question.
I was stumped. A feeling of failure swept over me as I came to the realization that I could not think of one single thing that I’ve accomplished. I began to sift through old writings of mine in hopes of finding inspiration.
I came across writings that brought tears to my eyes. Writings of pain, hopelessness and anger. Writings of struggles, of times when I wanted to give up; when life no longer seemed worth all the heartache.
I came across writings that were filled with self-hate. I wanted to delete all of these writings and erase them from my memory. Erase all the hurt that had consumed so much of my life.
As I swallowed hard, trying not cry, I allowed all my thoughts to consume me. Pain that I had tried to ignore for so long and scars that were still so visible. Once again, I wished I had a different past, one that wasn’t full of so much sorrow. But this was not the case. And I already knew that.
I am strong. So strong. I am fearless. The person I have become in the last year is someone I should be am proud of. For that, I am thankful. I am thankful for all the times I got back up even though I didn’t want to. I no longer spend nights wishing for a different life, a different outcome. In so many ways, the pain was worth it.
& that is my biggest accomplishment. I am my own accomplishment. I can look back at my life with no regret because my story has made me who I am today; someone that I love and am proud of.